Water Shade
by Thorn In Your Side
Summary: SuiSasu. He mourns the loss of his innocence, and Suigetsu wishes he knew what to say.


Water Shade

**Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto!  
A/N: SuiSasu is quickly worming its way to a special place in my heart. Who knows, maybe some day soon this'll be my yaoii OTP!**

**x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x**

Ripples lapped against the mossy bank like a tentative child reaching for a delicate toy. The pond was not natural…that much was evident from just looking at it, so out of place in the viridian glory of the forest, a splash of azure in an ocean of emerald. He sat down a few feet away from the water, drawing his knees up to his chest, and wrapping his arms around them. The tarry eyes flicked towards the pond with a detached curiosity, and then back to the moss at his feet.

He was thinking about _**him. **_

The blue eyes still plead with him late at night to come back, the memory of the sun kissed smile haunted him, tying him to everything he'd left behind. Naruto. His best friend, his first kiss. The most precious bond he had, the one he'd tried to break away from. It was impossible, now he knew: friendships weren't relationships. You couldn't just say that you weren't together anymore. You couldn't just stop being friends. So Sasuke had tried to become his enemy…but Naruto had pursued him with that indomitable determination.

He closed his eyes, visions of long-ago days dancing hazily in his mind's eye. Sakura. Naruto. Kakashi. Konoha. His village, his people. His family.

A few drops of coolness dripped onto his nose, and he snapped his eyes open to glare at the pond. He should've known better than to expect peace here.

"Suigetsu."

With a wild whoop that was absorbed by the sanctity of the forest, the teen broke free of his liquid domain, landing with a soft wet thump on the moss, water dripping from his naked body.

"You called, oh ever glorious leader?" he quirked his head to the side, eyes twinkling merrily.

"Put some clothes on, and leave me alone."

"Oh pooh, you spoil sport. What'd I do?"

"How about we start with your being _**alive **_and then move on to the fact that your sole purpose in life is to irritate me?"

"My sole purpose in life is not to _**irritate **_you," Suigetsu pouted, sitting down next to the Uchiha, "It's to get into _**bed **_with you."

Sasuke sighed heavily, and buried his head in his arms. Suigetsu cocked his head to the side, unused to this apathy. Sasuke _**always **_reacted to Suigetsu's needling, at least when they were alone; when the boy didn't have a reputation of callousness to uphold. He poked his shoulder tentatively, expecting a swift punch in the face, or maybe even the chidori. He received no response, so he poked him again. And again, and again, and again…

"What!?" Sasuke hissed, looking up after the squillionth jab.

"What?" Suigetsu asked innocuously, "I was just, y'know. Poking."

Sasuke scowled. "Suigetsu, go away."

"You always say that. You never mean it."

Sasuke looked away from him, pain evident in his eyes. "I do now."

Suigetsu sat next to him, trying to think of something to say to make everything alright. He took a quick glance to the side, figuring out his problem. It must be Naruto; it usually was. Something clenched in Suigetsu's heart, like it always did when he thought of the demure Uchiha and the hyperactive blond.

"Relax," Suigetsu whispered, "When this is over, you'll have the rest of your life to apologize to him. He'll take you back. He has to."

The words hung in the air like an unwanted shawl, unsure of whether they were heard or not, unsure whether they would be followed by more sentences or not. Suigetsu regretted speaking, but knew he never could have kept quiet.

After some length, Sasuke lifted his head. The sharp toothed male was surprised to see that his eyes were swimming in tears.

"I've killed someone. He can never understand that. He will try, but he won't be able to. He's _**innocent,**_" he said.

Suigetsu instinctively reached out to him, wrapping his stronger arms around his companion's shoulders, tugging him into a reluctant embrace. "Don't be stupid. You're just as innocent as the next idiot. I mean, you don't even know what Karin has in store for you, do you?"

"She wants to make babies or something," the other mumbled.

"Yeah, but do you know the mechanics?"

"Huh?"

Suigetsu sighed. "Sasuke, you turd. You're innocent, remarkably so for having lived with Orochimaru for three years. I don't think you're tainted at all, babe. Stop worrying your pretty little head over it, alright?"

Sasuke did. He wasn't sure if it was the words, or the tone, or the fact that Suigetsu had such nice arms, but he dozed off in his embrace, willing himself to believe that his best friend would take him back.

00000000000000000000000000000

_**"No!" The man's eyes were wide with fear, "Don't! Please, don't! Please—argh!"**_

_**Sasuke stopped breathing along with him, his katana driven up to its hilt into the man's chest. Blood blossomed on his shirt like a flower on fast forward, and Sasuke cringed. He had done this. He had taken a life. Orochimaru's hand was heavy on his shoulder. **_

_**"Well done, Sasuke-kun."**_

_**No, not at all. He'd killed a man. **_

"Don't touch me!" he screamed at the contact. Suigetsu drew his hand back swiftly, alarmed and hurt.

"I'm sorry," he said, "I was just putting you into bed, and you started tossing and turning so I thought I should wake you up."

"Get away," Sasuke said coldly. A frown appeared on Suigetsu's face. "What—"

"I said get _**away.**_"

The sheer hostility in his voice pissed the water nin off. Who the hell did he think he was? Being in charge didn't give him the right to lord it over them! Suigetsu had had _**enough **_of this brattish behavior. People had been letting the Uchiha get away with far too much, and now he'd toed the line.

He grabbed the pale forearm and dragged him upright, ignoring the brunet's indignant yelp and Karin's outraged shouts and Juugo's contemplative silence. He stormed back to where the pool had been, shoving Sasuke against the tree roughly.

"Alright, jerkwad. Talk."

Red eyes flared up in anger, but Suigetsu shook him like a rag doll until the light went out of his eyes. "If you try to sharingan me, I'll castrate you when I break the genjutsu. And you know I can. So talk, Uchiha, and don't leave anything out. You need help, you really do. I'm offering it to you, so just…_**talk.**_"

"Why?"

"What?"

"Why me?" Sasuke murmured, "What did I do? There was nothing…there was everything…I was good. I had family. I had love. I had all I wanted in the wide world. He tore it all apart, for the sake of himself. But is it true? Why? Why me?"

Suigetsu drew him close, but the slighter male stiffened. "Don't…_**touch **_me."

"You were having a nightmare, weren't you?"

"My first time murdering someone. He was screaming all the while. He had everything I wanted. Friends, family, love. He was me in another life—weak and powerless to stop his impending death. And I _**killed **_him, because Orochimaru told me it would make it easier to kill Itachi. But did it? I don't think so. I imagine him with that look on his face, that look of complete terror, knowing that he wants to live, but can't because I'm ending his life…and I die on the inside."

"You're insane," Suigetsu said, "And for the love of god, let me touch you. I won't rape you, I promise. Well…I'll try not to."

Sasuke didn't smile. But then again, he never smiled. Suigetsu sighed.

"I don't know what I'm supposed to say to make this better," he said flatly, "You made the decision to kill your brother. You made the decision to go to Orochimaru. You can make the decision to end those decisions; you can go back to Konohagakure…where _**Naruto **_is waiting for you—"

"Why the emphasis on Naruto?"

Suigetsu glared at him. "Like you don't know."

"I don't," Sasuke said honestly.

"I love you, retard!"

A furrow appeared in the brunet's brow. "And?"

"And? And? And you love Naruto!"

"What?" Sasuke laughed—he actually laughed! "Naruto? Me, love Naruto? Are you insane?"

Apparently.

"You don't love him?"

"He's my best friend. Nothing more. Come back to the part where you love me, though, that sounds interesting."

Suigetsu pulled a face. "Stop that. We were talking about you. Look, Sasuke, I know you've been through a lot of shit. Frankly speaking, I don't _**care, **_and I love you. I doubt anyone cares. Naruto wants you back for yourself, okay? I want you for yourself. Who you are now, here, in the present. And if you choose to be someone else, everyone who loves you will keep loving you. I'm on that list of people, alright? What I'm trying to say is…well…I…I guess…"

"You didn't have a point to make, did you?"

"No," Suigetsu grinned, "No, I didn't. I just think you need to stop being such a dick."

Sasuke looked deep into his companion's eyes, and nodded slowly. "I guess I could do that."

"Good," Suigetsu nuzzled the top of his head, "Good."

**x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x**

**Well, when I started this SuiSasu was on its way to becoming my yaoii OTP, now, about two weeks later, it is. I'unno, this just kept meandering all over the place and I can't say I'm thrilled with the way it turned out, but I still like it enough to post it. **


End file.
